While He Is Sleeping
by ShelPenguin
Summary: Sirius's thoughts on Harry through out the years. They could be "Missing Moments" but it'll just be a series of one-shots into a story. Some of the later chapters will be spiritrual as Sirius dies but still looks on at Harry and his family.
1. Godfather

**While He Is Sleeping**

Chapter One - Godfather

"Moony!" Sirius whined. He closed his eyes and lolled his neck back as he paced the marble floor of the maternity ward at St. Mungo's. "What is taking them so long!?"

"Pushing out a baby takes a while, Padfoot," Remus said in an annoyed tone. He shushed Peter, who sat next to him, as he laughed at Sirius.

"It's been hours!" Sirius exclaimed.

"They told you not to come for a few more hours so we didn't have to wait so long!" Remus yelled in the quietest voice he could muster.

He was nearing a full moon and Sirius had been giving him a massive head ache for the past four and a half hours. And... the healer behind the desk had been glaring at them while filing her nails and smacking her gum ever since the trio arrived. It seemed obvious at first because Sirius as been pacing and whining and asking the same question ever since he got here. But as the time went on and Remus has hand more time to think, he thinks he or Sirius might have slept with her at a party they had thrown; her face was getting more and more familiar by the hour.

"Then why did you come?" Sirius replied indignately to his friend's earlier comment.

Remus shot Sirius a nasty look which earned a wheezy chuckled from Peter. "You came to my house, woke me up, forced me into cloths, and then _dragged _me out of my house and here." He growled.

The lobby was silent besides Sirius's feet hitting the floor as he paced back and forth, back and forth, it was silent. The healer blew a large bubble again as she glared, more spesifically at Sirius which made Remus feel better, and looked at the clock on the wall impatiently. She seemed to want this baby to come as much as Sirius - and the other two Marauders. But her reason was likely to be the fact that the three would leave her lobby. As if the heavens decided to answer all they're prayers, another pair of foot steps joined Sirius's which caused the man to finally stop pacing.

As soon as they saw the fourth Marauder, Remus and Peter stood and created a line with Sirius. They stood anxiously for James to near, and once they saw what he was so intent on they quietly sprinted over to him to look at what was inside the blue bundle of blankets. Sirius made it to James first with the biggest grin and biggest sigh of relief out of all of them.

"What's his name!" Sirius exclaimed in a whisper, as to not wake the newborn. He seemed like he was about to jump up and down.

"Harry," James whispered lovingly, still staring at his son. "Harry James Potter."

"Yay! You got the James in there!" Peter grinned, patting his friend on the back in congradulations.

Remus, now as excited as Sirius, put the said man in a head lock and ruffled his hair since he couldn't do it to James. Sirius didn't mind though, he held back a laugh and leaning closer to Harry after being released. James had spent the last nine months trying to convince Lily to name their son James - be she, rightly, had refused. But it seems Lily had cracked some point after giving birth to her son; settling with James as the middle name.

"Do you want to hold him?" James asked Sirius, who he knew was most anxious.

Sirius nodded frantically and so the new father carefully passed the infant to his best friend and the mane who was practically his brother. The pass was a sucess, but the father hovered his hands under Harry. Sirius smiled at the baby but also at his friend; he knew that James was forever changed, for the best. He now had another thing he loved more than his own life and Sirius knew that James would do anything for the tiny human being that was now sleeping in his arms - Sirius would do anything for the child as well. To show James that he could take care of Harry, he took a step back so James's hands weren't hovering under Harry anymore and James grinned sheepishly.

"You'll be godfather, right?"

Sirius finally managed to look away from the baby, gasping. Remus and Peter smiled at their two friends; this was expected.

"Lily and I... We want you to be godfather to Harry," James grinned.

Sirius didn't answer verbally, and James knew that it was because his best friend may get chocked up if he had to speak. This was just another validation that Sirius was apart of the Potter family. Instead of answering, he bounced Harry gently in his arms in a soothing manner and began cooing to his new godson.

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><p>I'm writing a new Harry Potter story and at some point it reminded me of this story so I began to re read it. My writing is a lot differnt (I think for the better) now and so I'm going to fix the chapters I've posted and hopefully post more. I am so sorry that I haven't updated in so long, I didn't even realize it; I kind of fell out of writing for a little while but now I write a lot more so I'm starting to get back in the groove of things! I hope you like this chapter now since it's a little different, and I would love to hear from you and get to know what you think. :)<p> 


	2. Share the Sickness

**While He Is Sleeping**

Chapter Two - Share the Sickness

Sirius walked up the stone path to the cottage that his two friends and godson lived in, opening the door without knocking and opening his mouth to call into the warm and inviting home.

"HONEY, I'M-" A petite hand slapped itself over Sirius's mouth before he could finish. "Ow Evans!" he exclaimed, pulling the redhead's hand off of his face.

"Shut the hell up," she growled angrily shaking her head, her usual bright emerald eyes dim with exhaustion.

The push door that separated the end of the foyer and the kitchen opened slowly and James came out with two coffee mugs in his hands. His round specticles were slowly sliding down his nose and he sent a frustrated look at his best friend. Sirius was still standing by the door, waiting stubbornly for a hello.

Instead he got, "You do know we have a baby, right?" in a sarcastic voice.

"Why yes I do," Sirius huffed, hands going to his hips in an arrogant manner. It's not like he could tell when Harry would be sleeping.

James handed his wife one of the mugs which she took gratefully, an expression coming onto her face that convinced Sirius that she wanted to marry it. He smirked at her, but it didn't stay on his handsome face for long. Now that James had a free hand, he used it to slap Sirius across the face. Sirius made an affronted face and touched his now red cheek, following with his eyes the two parents as they moped into their living room; James plopping down into his chair and Lily collasping onto their sofa.

"What was that for?" Sirius asked indignately, sitting down on the sofa at Lily's feet. The mug of coffee was still in her hands, but her head was against the arm of the sofa and she was already fast asleep.

"No more yelling in the house unless you're in here and see Harry's eyes open," James muttered drowsily as he used his palm as a pillow.

"Prongslet sitll sick, eh?" Sirius shuckled sympathetically for his friends.

James's head nodded as he slipped into unconciousness, a snore rippling through his throat. Sirius sat there for a couple more minutes, admiring the two's limp forms before sighing in boredom. He stood up and stretched, grabbing a handful of candies from the small dish on the coffee table. Sirius took the stairs quietly, making sure not to make enough noise to wake the four month old. His godson has been sick for five days now and it was beginning to take it's toll on his young parents.

Sirius entered the nursery and heard light wheezes through a stuffy nose. He smiled sadly at the little one and and walked over to the crib before carefully taking the infant into his arms. Slowly, he backed into the rocking chair and held Harry to his chest, placing a kiss on Harry's forehead to feel it burning up. Sirius rocked back and forth, murmuring a lullaby as Harry continued to sleep, breathing evenly through his chapped lips. Harry had a shocking amount of black hair that spread out in all different directions. Lily wasn't too happy about her son's inherited hair, but it seemed to be forgotten when Harry's eyes were opened - showing off his bright, almond-shaped, emerald eyes. And, when he wasn't sick, he had a winning, sarcastic, personality.

He had already spit up on three of Sirius's shirts and two of Remus's; probably even more with James since the father was with his son all day. Harry had also ganged up on Sirius with Remus during one of their babysitting ventures, covering his face with Lily's make up. He also had already learned how to fling his cereal around the kitchen and splash the water obnoxiously while having a bath in the kitchen sink. The Maraurder's most favorite Potter-gene, though, was when Harry would cry everytime Lily tried to scold him - and even on the rare occasion that someone else would. Everytime they would open their mouth to say something, he would cry out. As if knowing what Sirius was thinking about, Harry cried out again, squirming in discomfort.

"Shhh," Sirius sushed, humming a new lullaby and rocking to a beat.

"Paddy?"

Sirius looked up, grinning at James - who seemed like a small child who was about to fall asleep where he stood.

"Yes Jamie?" Sirius cooed mischieveously. He knew James was mostly asleep and wouldn't remember this conversation anyways.

"Lil and I are..." He yawned loudly. "Weregoingtobed."

Sirius chuckled. "I'll make sure to tuck you two in before I got night-night myself."

James nodded and slowly circled around, heading to the master bedroom where Sirius was sure Lily was already passed out in. Once he heard the door close and a spring in their mattress squeak in protest as James fell on the bed, Sirius looked back down at Harry. Carefully as to not wake the baby, Harry moved some of the black frizz from the pale forehead. He placed another kiss on the hot skin, and then pulled away. "I think your daddy's on crack," he chuckled, resuming the slow rocking in the chair.

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><p>So here's chapter two updating; and a bit longer. I hope you enjoy this, I kept the things people reviewed about most. Leave a comment and let me know what you think of it :)<p> 


	3. Something Good

**While He Is Sleeping**

Chapter Three - Something Positive

Sirius's eyes burned with tears as he rolled his head back against the grim covered, brick wall of his cell in Azkaban.

_Azkaban. With dementors. _

It was hell, and he had only been here for around four hours. Sirius let out a shakey breath, he was born into a good family but that went to shit. Then his life was good - great - and now it's back to shit again. It seemed to be an on going crisis of the life of Sirius Black. He couldn't believe as the minutes ticked by, it was becoming longer and longer since his _family _had been murdered. Nearly six hours ago Sirius had flown to visit Peter, to check up on him like the good friend I am. But what he found showed that Peter wasn't the good friend like Sirius.

Peter's place hadn't been in ruins either, it was just abandoned. Knowing - or dreading - what had happened Sirius had flown on his motorcycle to the Potter's cottage in Godric's Hallow. When he arrived, the first thing Sirius awknowledged the house. It was suppose to be under the fedius charm and the fact that he could see it proved that he was right. The nursery was burnt black, too, which made Sirius cry out and break into a sprint into the broken front door. Nobody else had been there, and the first thing Sirius saw was his brother laying lifeless on the floor, sprawled out in a wierd angle and his hazel eyes dark and wide.

Sirius screamed and collasped onto the ground beside James, hunching over the body possesively as he sobbed uncontrollably. He was sure that the muggle neighbors were beginning to crowd around the house, but he didn't care. Anyone could come and stare at him weep, Sirius _did not care _about anything anymore. There was a high pitched cry from upstairs which caused Sirius to jump up. He looked around the now broken house until his eyes landed on the stairs that led to the bedrooms.

He had ran up the stairs and threw the debry covered hall, into the nursery. Stopping at the site of another of his best friends dead, also sprawled out on the floor in front of her baby son's crib. Sirius cried out again, a sob racking through is body as he snatched his crying godson out of his crib and into his arms - falling to the ground next to Lily's limp form, leaning over her like he had with James, except this time with their living child in his arms. The child, having gone through everything he had tonight, only had one peculiar scar, on his fore head shaped like a lightening bolt.

Hagrid had arrived and pried the wailing baby out of his arms. Sirius left his motot bike witht he giant and the baby at the ruined cottage, tracking down the one person that was now filling his mind with murderous thoughts. Sirius couldn't help but curse at himself, burying his face in his dirty hands. If only he had been reasonable, and had stayed there so he could explain how James and Lily had switched secret keepers and it was really Peter Pettigrew they wanted. But no. Sirius had to be recklass and leave and try to kill Peter with vengance.

The last time that Sirius had seen Harry filtered in his mind as dementors began to sweep by the cells. He needed to concentrate on Harry; if the ministry ever let Sirius have a trial, the only way he will last until then was if he kept his thoughts happy - which meant he had to think about Harry.

_It was September, and the little boy had waddled up to his godfather, raising his arms and demanding to be picked up by his favorite godfather. Sirius had taught him how to say that. Harry didn't know that Sirius was his only godfather, but Sirius was sure that even if there were other's he would still be the toddler's favorite. Harry jabbered happily to his new company, apparently relaying everything that had gone on his life to the man as Sirius carried him into the kitchen and greeted Lily who hadn't come to the door like James. The two's conversation only lasted a couple of minutes; then his new toy broom stick was brought up and Harry squirmed out of Sirius's arms. _

_Lily and James groaned simulateously, glaring at their friend. _

_"Umph!" Sirius was on his back instantly, and so was James but in laughter. Lily laughed at Sirius, but chased after her son to keep an eye on him._

_"Merlin... I didn't know it went that fast," Sirius mumbled, rubbing the back of his head where it had made contacted with the wood flooring. _

_"Really?" laughed ames. "I thought you meant to do that to us. Do you know how many glass things that kid has smashed?" As if on que, there was the sound of shattering chine and a frustrated scream from the reheaded mother. _

_"Ten?" Sirius guessed evenly, grinning._

_"Now eleven," James chuckled, shaking his head._

_As expected, the Potters invited Sirius to stay for dinner. Sirius spoke with James and Lily about what was going on for a while before dismissing himself to go and spend time with Harry. When he reached the living room, he stopped in the door way and let a grin filter onto his handsome face. Harry was sleeping on the floor, his mouth hanging open and drool showing with soft snores being emitted from his throat. The toddler snuggled with his toy broom stick, earning another chuckle from Sirius before he distangled the toy from Harry's arms and sent it back to his bedroom with a flick of his wand. _

_Sirius picked Harry up from the floor, wiping his chin, and then resting his small, exhausted, frame against his chest and sitting on the sofa. So much had happened in this very living room, it was incredible. Christmas, 1979, Lily got sick and told the Maraurders - including James - that she was pregnant. Sirius had read many pregnancy books in this living room with both Lily and James, just eager to find out more about their upcoming future. Two weeks after Harry was born, Sirius practically had moved in on this very sofa just to be with his godson and help in any way that he could. The first Christmas with Harry would always be burnt into Sirius's head - literally. It had been total chaos; the tree falling, a candle singed the back of Sirius's head, the light's burnt the cat's tail (it deserved it) and the giggles and snores all around gave everyone a head ache. _

_When Harry took a step for the first time, it was in this room. It hadn't been to anyone in particular, he had just decided to take a few steps before losing his footing and plopping down. And his first word "Snitch", or "Sneech" as Harry had muttered. _

_Harry gave an abrupt snored and shook slightly, snuggling closer into Sirius's shirt. Sirius didn't know when the next time he saw Harry would be, so he took advantage of the situation and wrapped his arms aroung the small body, holding him impossibley closer to him and pressing a kiss into the outrageous mop of black hair._

Another sob ripped through Sirius and he quickly turned into his animagus form, focusing on his godson that had already lost so much before he was two years old. Padfoot curled into a ball in the farthest corner of the cell and closed his eyes, making sure only memories with Harry crossed his mind. Even though Sirius and Harry had lost a lot this night, they hadn't lost each other.

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><p>The third updated chapter in While He Is Sleeping! :) I will e posting the updated version of chapter four in the morning. This version is quite a bit longer, and I like it a lot more than the older version. Sorry if it's beeen long enough that you don't remember, but let me know what you think about this one!<p> 


	4. Twelve Years Gone

**While He Is Sleeping**

Chapter Four - Twelve Years Gone

In Padfoot form, Sirius sighed. His paws hurt and he as hungry and tired. He wanted badly to sit down, but knew if he did he wouldn't get back up. Sirius was in front of Hogwarts, waiting for the doors to open by that cat... _Crookshanks? _The cat didn't necessarily give him details on what was going on, but knew Sirius's plan and said tonight was the night.

Finally one of the large doors open and the orange cat stood in opening. Walking into Hogwarts may be too much for Sirius; he hadn't been there in over a decade. Once inside, his eyes closed shut as he walked, trying to dull all of his senses and not just collaspe and roll around on the stone floors. The cat meowed, telling Sirius to follow him to the common room but the dog growled; he knew how to get to his common room.

Sirius also knew, though, that is godson - who wasn't quite the godson he remembered - was sleeping in the dorm that he was going for. When Sirius reached the common room portrait - which he got to himself - he changed back into human form around the corner to read the password. In human form, Sirius was sheet white with long, tangled black hair that hung to the middle of his back. As un groomed as he was now, he think he looked pretty good for someone who had spent twelve years in Azkaban. With all of his thoughts of Harry and James and Lily and Remus, and in Padfoot form where the dementors couldn't affect him as much, he had been as good as you can be while in that hell hole.

Sirius memorized the first five passwords on the parchment Crookshanks had given him a few days prior. He knew the Fat Lady would rat him out as soon as possible so he would have to be quick. Slowly, Sirius moved around, not looking up at the portrait so that she couldn't see his face. But at the sound of... _Sir McLaggin_!? Sirius let out a hallow laugh; this idiot had been the portrait for one of the Maraurder's passage way so Sirius used to spend a bit of time with him.

And getting in would be easy now! As long as Sirius gave Sir McLaggin the correct password, he could go in with no problems. While the portrait did it's normal joust rutine and asked Sirius multiple times if he would like to fight, Sirius read off the passwords. After a few he got it right and Sir McLaggin stopped what he was doing to sigh. He wung open and let Sirius through; stepping in side his first home away from home hit Sirius like a hex. He wanted to just sink down and sleep on his favorite sofa. There seemed to have been a party _quidditch. _

Memories of the quidditch parties that had been thrown while Sirius was at school flooded his brain and he had to resist the urge to grab food off of one of the tables as he passed. He knew that if he ate he would just get hungrier. He began climbing up the stairs up through the boy dormitories until he reached the door that was labeled "Third Years." Sucking in and holding his breath, Sirius opened the door carefully to make sure that it didn't squeak and he only opened it enough for his slim form to get through.

There were five beds inside, and he didn't know which one held Peter. He looked at the bed closest to his right side but before peeking in he saw a muggle soccor poster and a picture of a black family. The first boy he saw was a scrawny, freckled one and then the next was a blonde with a round face. _Neville Longbottom! _Damn he looked like Alice. He and Harry were born on the same day and since the Maraurders and Lily were friends with Frank and Alice, the two babies had had a number of play dates. Sirius knew that Frank and Alice were patatoes in St. Mungo's now, and it broke his heart to think about it. _Neville would have been raised by Frank's mother? Poor thing. _

The next bed made Sirius freeze. There were quidditch posters all around and a picture on the night stand; which caught Sirius's attention immediately. A messy haired, young man was spinning his red haired wife in front of a stone fountain which Sirius knew to be in Godric's Hallow's square. He had taken the picture of the two himself, and Remus was right next to him, smiling at his friends. The two were grinning and laughed, James winking at Sirius. The picture didn't show it, but Lily was gaining a little belly that held her son.

The man couldn't stop himself, and before he realized what he was doing, Sirius was gently pulling back the curtain around the bed. Harry James was sleeping soudly on the bed. He seemed to still snore, and his was on his stomach with his arms at wierd angles like James had slept. His mouth agape one of his hands was in his wild hair. _He looks so much like James, _Sirius thought with a surprised smile. He could stand here forever and be the happiest man on the planet.

A squeak from the last bed pulled Sirius back into reality, and he pulled out his knife and walked silently over there. To confirm it, Sirius looked over the posters and the picture of the all redheaded family he had seen in the prophet. With the thought of Harry in his head, he pulled the drape, ready for whatever came next.

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><p>The last updated chapter! :) Let me know what you think of it.<p> 


	5. He Sees Everything

**While He Is Sleeping **

Chapter Five - He Sees Everything

I ignored all of the sound going on around me. Molly Weasley was sitting near the head of Harry's bed in the hospital wing, sweeping his messy black hair out of his face unnecessarily but rightly out of his face as tears rolled down her cheeks. She had kept quiet like Dumbledore had asked, but she couldn't stop crying. I understood, though. I was crying inside; I would be weeping if I was in human form. But I couldn't help but envy her. She knew Harry well, spent time with him; she was able to mother him now when he needs to be mothered. Lily should be mothering him, crying. James should be sitting beside his wife, crying or trying to comfort her. Even Remus and I should be helping, and smoothing Harry's bed sheets like it really matters if they're flat.

Bill was mostly staring at Harry and his mother. I know that Bill went to the Qidditch cup with Harry, but I don't know if they spent much time together and I think that's the only time they ever really talked. He was older though, and was more aware of what was going on in the outside world. Working for Gringotts also gave him advantages. He had a sad look on his face, but I could tell there was something else there as if it was his support system kicking in. He would glance at Ron and Hermione - who were staring at their friend hopelessly - with a sypathetic look and I knew that I liked him.

Ron seemed to be more hopeless than Hermione as he looked at Harry. He would occasionally look between his mother and me nervously, seeming to be afriad that his Molly would either know who I was or that I would transfer back into Sirius Black and put her into cardiac arrest. Hermione was crying softly, watching Harry out or worry but also petting me behind me ear in a soothing manner. It soothed me, but it also seemed to sooth her as well which made me feel some what of use.

_Why does everything happen to Harry? He's already lost three people and that is three too many for a fourteen year old. And he'll take the blame? Harry is too selfless to not take the blame; his parents died protecting him, and Cedric died because he had gone with Harry._

James and Lily were thrown into the wirlwind that parenthood is itself, but then also into hiding. They dropped everything to hide and protect Harry; only to be betrayed by one of their best friends. When they died Harry was sent to live with Lily's shit relatives instead of me or Remus like he should have been. He had to spend ten miserable years with them and still has to go back every summer. And even while Harry's here he can't get away from hell.

All of the troubles he had at the end of his first year and then everything that happened in his second. Last year he thought I was trying to kill him all year, and then he had the dementors going at him every chance they could, and then he lost Moony at the end of the year. This year he had to go through the Triwizard Tournament!

The final challenge of the tournament he was too young to be in should have been the easier one. I know there was a lot of stuff in the thoughout the maze but I prefered it rather than the dragon and an hour under water. Of course, though, a death eater had to ruin it. Obviously I knew Crouch was the person that put Harry through everything this year anyways, but this was the worst thing.

He and Cedric had made it to the cup together; and both being from Hogwarts, they decided to take it together. Harry had to watch his friend be murdered in cold blood by the man that had betrayed his parents, then he had to have blood taken by the same rat to recreate the most dangerous and feared wizard in the whole world - Voldemort. Voldemort came back to life in front of Harry and after talking to all of the death eaters that weren't in Azkaban, Harry had to dual Voldemort. James and Lily had come out of Voldemort's wand and had helped Harry like the brilliant parents they were. When he had gotten back to his school - his home - he had been let down by the professor he had trusted all years, finding out that the said professor wasn't a professor at all really, and had put him through all of this.

For now though, he's sleeping in the hospital wing with people who love him surrounding him. I stood up on my four legs and jumped gently onto the end of Harry's bed, settling myself in between his legs and closing my eyes with a sigh. I loved Harry, and I hope he knows I do. I know he doesn't remember me ever telling him and now I feel it may be pushing the boundaries of our relationship. He has been through so much I just want to hug him and hold him to me.

Earlier when he was crying I wanted to just pull him into my arms and cry with him. I wanted to do everything I could possibly do for him and I knew I would in a heart beat. Everything in my life revolved around him, and I had no problem with it. He was little Harry who isn't so little anymore. He's grown up too fast and seen way too many things; but I will always be there for him.\

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><p>A completely new chapter, yay! I want to thank and welcome all of my followers and my new followers that I have gained since updating the other chapters. Please leave some comments on what you think of this one, thanks!<p> 


	6. Back in Reach

**While ** **He Is Sleeping**

Chapter Six - Back in Reach

I could distinctly hear two faint _cracks _and bit down a smile with Remus. The twins, Fred and George have been taking advantage of their new status ever since their seventeenth birthday. They've been here all summer, along with all of the other Weasleys. Whereas Molly was annoyed with their antics - and probably some of the Order members as well - I thoroughly enjoyed their presence.

They were pranksters, and I had began talking with them back in June. At some point the Maraurder's map came up; their guide for the first five years at Hogwarts. Once they found out who I was, and Remus, they had become like servers. It was quite nice, and I loved that they would come straight to me to talk. It made me feel good that someone wanted to come to me for help or just someone to talk to. And Molly. I felt like a rebellious teenager when it came to Molly.

She was a little too up tight now adays for my liking. Arthur of course had defended his wife once she had left the room. "She's under a lot of stress. Percy isn't talking to us, You-Know-Who is back, and she has too move four rambunctious teenagers into a secret house that a supposed mass murder lives in." I guess in that sense I can understand, but I still think that she is too up tight.

Two _cracks _snapped me out of my trance and I chuckled again, thinking that maybe the kids will go to bed now. After the people began to leave, I sat down in the kitchen with Moony. We didn't talk, just kept each other company as he read a book and I thought about Harry. It was his first night here in Grimauld Place and just seeing him I was _elated. _He seemed even more skinnier, which I blame for unmalnourished and the growth spirt that occured over the summer.

I stood up and nodded farewell to Moony for the night before heading up stairs. Instead of going to my room, though, I walked to the room I knew Harry was staying in. I remained silent my whole way up there, and with years of experience I listened for any sounds from the other side of the door. Once there was only Ron's loud snores, I carefully opened the door and closed it almost completely once I had gotten in. Ever since I got wind of the dementor attack in Little Winging, I have wanted Harry here and in my grasp. We couldn't - well, Dumbledore wouldn't let us. I talked to Ron and Hermione about it even though I wasn't suppose to. They told me the little information they knew about Harry's life at the Dursley's and I don't even think I was told all of what they knew.

Harry was only asleep on one side of his bed so I sat on the side that he wasn't on. He was breathing deeply and loudly; his chest rising and falling. I had no idea of what has gone on in his life, and I am realizing that with every day that passes. I know his first year and a half, I know some of his third year, and I know his fourth year. I still have about thirteen years to find out but I don't know how time I will have to do that.

He has been through so much and I just hope the rest of his life will be easier. I know of the prophecy and I know what is going to happen. I sucked in a breath and looked down at my godson who was now fifteen years old. He had witnessed so many things and even though I knew it was only going to get worse from here for him, I hoped that at some point he could get a life that he wants. That he could live his own life, his own destiny, and that he would be happy.

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><p>Another update, yay! I know that I haven't really had anything happen in these past two chapters, and I seriously debated even writing them. To me, I just always need something to happen so I'm not quite sure how they have turned out because of that. But anyways, I think these are important time periods so I wrote them. I'd love feedback on the updated chapters and the new ones; the next one will have more action and will also be the last chapter that Sirius is alive in! I have ideas for the spiritual chapters with Sirius looking down on Harry, but if you have anything you'd like to see leave a comment and let me know - I'll take them into account!<p> 


	7. Passing Aftermath

****Note about chapter: So thank you those who sent me requests of what to do during the spiritual chapters; I have them planned out and will hopefully keep a steady update with the new chapters. I'm not going to change the name of the story, but as a heads up, most of these chapters are not 'while he is sleeping'! In these chapters Sirius is really just going to be looking down on certain things that happen to Harry, and you will get his train of thought about it. I hope all of you wonderful readers still enjoy the story.**

****Another note about chapter: I'm not taking any religious sides with these up coming chapters, so please take note of that now. In my head, for this type of thing I just imagine it kind of what J.K. wrote. But I also added my own little thing; the intro to this (which you're about to read) is similar to J.K.'s version of the afterlife. The things following is my extension of that. I'm writing like you think about something and it'll appear in a sense. They kind of live normal lives but not on earth. The whole 'window' concept is another thing I came up with while writing this chapter. It allows the deceased to look down on people; they get to choose who they look down but for this Sirius is obviously looking down at Harry. Also assume that there are multiple windows.**

**Thank you so much, happy reading!**

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><p><strong>While He Is Sleeping<strong>

Chapter Seven - Passing Aftermath

A gasp escaped my lips as I opened my eyes. Everything around me was white, and I sat up quickly, looking around. I was naked, and I felt around my body to see if anything was different; I had a shaven, clean face and there were no more bags under my eyes. My hair was shorter and not matted like it had been since Azkaban. With all of the improvements to myself I looked around again. There was nothing. Miles and miles of white nothingness until a pile of folded robes appeared in front of me.

I stood up slowly, this whole _dead _thing was still a new thing. I was suddenly hit with an explosive that blew emotions at me as I slipped on the robes. _I'm dead. I died and... And Harry saw it! I was crying, but the te_ars _weren't coming out. I had left Harry and Remus! Were they alright? I really can't see anybody here? _Then out of nowhere, there was a loud hoot that caused me to snap around just in time to be tackled.

"You're here! Finally my Padfoot is with me! Oh, I love you so much, Paddy, and I missed you!" the familiar voice of James Potter filledmy ears and I froze underneath my old friend. "I didn't want you to die, but I am so happy you're with me now!"

I looked up as James's grinning face hovered over mine. I gaped blankly at him for a moment before jumping up and hugging James tightly to me. James sighed and wrapped his arms around me in return, hugging me just as tightly back. After a few moments, he pried himself out of my grip and shook his messy hair out of his face.

"Lils stayed back to watch Harry; c'mon," he said, standing and pulling me to his feet.

I froze once again upon realization that Harry was at the ministry and still in danger. James and I ran through the white air until I came to an abrubt holt. There was still white air surrounding me, but the white air was now in forms of sofas and chairs. There were lines that were walls and seemed to separate area from area. I was in awe once again in this... _heaven. _

Lily was standing in front of a large window. Her legs together, left arm across her chest and right arm holding a finger nail in her mouth so that she could choose. Sirius's head was flooded with memories of Lily in this position but for exams to be handed back. James was by his wife now, resting his chin on her shoulder. Lily said, without looking away from the window, "Dumbledore arrived... Harry's okay so far."

"Good," James replied. "Now would be a good time to say hi to Sirius, love."

At once Lily's head turned away from the window and she soon ran and jumped into my arms, not knocking me down like her husband.

"Oh Sirius," she murmered. "I am so sorry Peter put youthrough all of that. Thank you so much for doing everything you did for Harry. I love you so much."

I was kind of relieved that we couldn't cry here; I would be a water fall if we could. I hugged Lily back and we held a quiet conversation. I wish I could have done more for Harry. I had hardly known him when I died. I would do anything to get back to him; even though I was useless the way I was at least I was there.

James called us back over in time to see Dumbledore and Voldemort's duel heat up a bit more. Voldemort - merlin's beard that thing was ugly - was screaming; Dumbledore would just yell back a reply. I looked around the scene for Harry, and the view instantly shifted so that I could see him being guarded by a statue. Bellatrix was also under a statue, and I grimaced, knowing that Harry must have ran after her. I was snapped out of my trance as Voldemort vanished as Dumbledore's water pool speared all over the floor. All three of us moved closer to the window so that we could look closer.

Dumbledore told Harry to stay still in a scared voice and I felt my gut tie itself in knots at the sound. I never wanted to hear Dumbledore afraid. Harry criedd out and fell onto his hands and knees. James, Lily and I all buried our faces in our hands; too sick to look at what was happening. But we could hear it. Voldemort was speaking, but through Harry's mouth. I shook as I watched through my fingers my godson's arms forcing themselves to hold him up as Voldemort told Dumbledore to kill Harry. The voice stopped, and I looked up to see Harry collaspe on the floor, Dumbledore crouching silently over Harry.

The emerald orbs opened and were blurred with fog and shined as if tears were about to fall. Harry was confused more than anything else and was spluttering, asking Dumbledore what was going on as the Atrium filled with Ministry people. James cried out with a cheer, hugging Lily to him.

"Fudge saw him! Fudge saw Voldemort!"

Dumbledore helped Harry up and spoke calmly to the officials. Harry took a portkey to Dumbledore's office, ordered to wait until Dumbledore got there. I found myself speaking to the window as if the people on the other side could hear me.

"Don't let Harry sit alone in your office!"

Lily gasped, covering her mouth. "That will just make Harry worse! No, Dumbeldore go with Harry!"

All three of us watched Harry try to get out of Dumbledore's office and ignore the portraits that were talking to him. After a few minutes the portraits realized that Harry wasn't going to talk, so they shut up. Harry leaned against the door; not trying to open it anymore, but just desperate to get out of the room.

"Padfoot," James said quietly. "C'mon, we'll show you around our area and explain something to you - there's people that will like to see you. We can come back when Dumbledore gets to the office maybe."

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><p>"Sirius," James sang. I looked over at him from my spot on a sofa with Marlene. "The Order is at the station! It looks like Harry won't be moping now."<p>

Marlene and I shared a look before I jumped up and made my way to the window that showed King's Cross. Ron led Harry, Hermione and Ginny off of the train and they paused momentarily at the larger-than-usual welcoming commitee. What I presume is Hermione's parents were standing, talking to Molly. Moody, Remus, Tonks, Arthur, Molly and Fred and George were standing in a group waiting for the teens. The four walked over tot he group, not hiding their surprise to see them all.

Molly hugged all four of them and then Hermione ws hugged by each of her parents as Remus and Harry talked. I knew that they got along great, and I hope that Remus can step into Harry's life more and be there. Remus loved Harry but, like me, he knew that he could just barge into a teenage boy's life and declare his unconditional, family-like, love for him; the need to protect him from everything. I chuckled to myself as I remembered a conversation I had with Remus one night, both of us were like mothers to Harry at times, then we were both fathers to him as well.

The order walked Harry to his worthless relatives that earned a snarl from Lily and began to go into a sarcastic but serious explaination. While Vernon tried to seem macho, everyone told them that if Harry told them something was wrong - even if they don't let him use the 'telephone' - the Dursley's would have to pay for it. Moody, Arthur, Remus and Tonks all spoke out, and the others nodded vigerously. Fred and George even popped their eye brows in a 'I dare you' way which I felt was to remind Vernon what they had done to Dudley the year previous.

All of the Order members that were at the station along with the teenagers said good bye to Harry and... And Harry smiled and waved good bye to them. Lily gave me a side way hug and James patted my shoudler. I've been sulking about Harry sulking ever since I first got here and to see him smile filled me with a new type of happiness. I'm just happy and thankful that Harry will keep living and not hallow himself away. Hopefully the Dursley's will remember Moody's threat and let him enjoy as much of the summer as he can because Harry's life is going to take an even more durastic turn for the worse.

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><p>So, just did two requests in one chapter. I hope you liked it! And since this is the first different type of chapter for this story, I would really appreciate comments on it! Let me know what you thought of everything and I will continue to write!<p> 


	8. New Undevelopments

**While He Is Sleeping**

Chapter Eight - New Undevelopments

"It's about time for Dumbledore to come and get Harry," I said to no one in particular. We found out that Dumbledore was going to read Harry my will, and I wanted to witness it.

The will was something I had written one day when I was wallowing myself away in self pity, then I had given it Dumbledore at an Order meeting. I knew that whatever happened Dumbledore would do what needed to be done. I glanced down at Harry through the window and chuckled. He seemed to be doing fine and he hadn't had any troubles over the summer; now he was peacefully asleep against his window and snoring loudly. I looked down at Dumbledore who was in his office, preparing to leave and go to Little Winging having no idea that Harry was not ready to leave at all.

Dumbledore apparated onto Harry's street as Harry's alarm went off, causing the teen to jump awake. He pressed his face against the window to look out at the aged wizard and as soon as he saw him he jumped to the middle of his room and began to pack his trunk. Lily stepped up beside me and snorted, shaking her head.

"He's so like his father," she grumbled.

We, and soon James, watched as Dumbledore entered the house and we laughed at the Dursleys. Harry hadn't told them that another wizard would be in there house, and they seemed to be a little... _stumped. _Dumbledore remained calm and proceeded to their living room, getting himself something to drink and making himself comfortable. I flinched slightly when Vernon asked whether or not I was dead. I knew that Harry hadn't talked to them much over the summer, but I also knew that it was probably bothering Harry to hear that.

Dumbledore told Harry about my will, and how I had left him everything. James made a comment that Harry was probably the wealthiest wizard now, right above the Malfoys who had just lost a lot of money since Voldemort reappeared. Lucius was trying to get himself out of trouble but it was not working. Harry, understandabley, didn't want my house. I thought it was a disgusting place as well but I figured Harry didn't want it because of memories. I snorted when I realized what the one complication was. Kreacher.

Kreacher appeared in the Dursley's living room and began to through a tantrum, proving to Dumbledore that he was in fact Harry's now. An evil smile appeared on my face, _mother would have loved this. _James patted my back, smirking and undoubtably thinking the same thing. Harry told him to shut up, and Kreacher did immediately; he was then sent to work in the Hogwarts kitchen. Harry also owned Buckbeak now, but he was going to let him live with Hagrid.

Harry quickly packed his trunk after returning to his bedroom. He went backk into the living room to find Dumbledore, who talked to the Durselys about Voldemort. It was all about how the Dursleys hadn't properly raised Harry, and never had treated him as their own. I knew this, the blank spots in Ron and Hermione's stories had been filled by James and Lily. I never liked the Dursleys, but I really hate them now. Then the blood protection Harry had at their house came up.

Dumbledore had told me about the protection that Harry had at the Dursleys, how he was the safest there because Lily had died in order to protect him. He had the same blood as Petunia, no matter how small it was, and it kept him safe. But it would be over soon, and I hadn't thought about that.

"I hadn't thought about that," James said, repeated my thoughts.

Lily nodded in agreement. "I guess I knew that it would end when he was of age, but I never fully thought about it."

Dumbledore and Harry went outside and down to the corner of the street before disapparating. Harry and Dumbledore hit the ground in a dark neighborhood, Harry wobbling slightly at the sensation of apparition.

"The sensation takes some getting used to," Dumbledore told Harry, who nodded and rubbed. I smiled but nodded with Harry, I prefered floo and flying.

"I think I'd prefer brooms," Harry muttered and I smiled proudly with James.

They walked and talked as Dumbledore led the way to somewhere. James, Lily and I did not know what was going on now, so we were very interested in what was happening. The three of us grimaced as the two of them talked about Inferi and Voldemort's army of it. They reached a house and Harry followed his headmaster up the stone path to the front door, but when Dumbledore stopped suddenly before entering, Harry walked into him.

"Oh dear. Oh dear, dear, dear," Dumbledore said quietly.

Lily gasped audibly; who's ever house they were out had been attacked, the front door was hanging off it's hinges. As Harry followed Dumbledore into the house with his wand out, he looked around with a gaping and not really preparing himself for a fight. Everything in the house was disheveled and broken and there was blood splattered across the walls. Harry suggested that the house's owner was taken, but DUmbledore quickly shot it down, seeming more confident now. The old man poke an arm chair with his wand and there was a loud "Ouch!"

Suddenly Horace Slughorn was where the chair was and all three of us gasped; more in a groaning way. Slughorn was the potions professor during our time; he was a good guy but annoying obbsessive of the 'special' students. As if we were thinking the same thing, James and I both looked over at Lily who turned bright red. She was smart enough to get on Slughorn's good side and since she was muggle-born, she impressed him even more. He took quite an intrest in James, Remus and I as well; all the _brilliant _trouble be caused during school. The three of us were smart too, so he took an intrest in finding out why we 'wasted our talents.'

James also had a well known family. His parents had been a major part in the wizarding community; James only ever wet to Slughorn's dinners though if Lily was going. I was intriguing to him though because I broke my family's tradition. I was sorted into Gryfindor instead of Slytherin, but even that wasn't enough to get invited to dinner. He liked Remus because he generally behaved in class and would make James and me behave, and he was also smart. The fact that he was a werewolf didn't bother Slughorn, but Slughorn did like to talk to him about it after classes.

Dumbledore explained to Slughorn how he knew where he was, and that nothing had actually happened to here. After a couple of minutes they flicked their wands and everything in the house began to fly back to it's place and fix itself. I watched as Harry watched the items fly around in awe; he was so unknowledgable about the magical world it made me kind of sad. But I also know that James always liked watching this charm, so it could just be the Potter in him. Out of the corner of my eye I could see that James was still memorized by the charm and I shook my head.

"It's a bit crual to use Harry, don't you think," Lily huffed, crossing her arms across her chest. I stared at her for a moment before everything clicked in my head.

I shrugged. "No offense Lils but your son kind of carries a presence... Him breathing is a pretty persuasive thing."

James chuckled quietly as he looked down at the scene. Lily was a bit more stern about everything Harry. James was obviously protective, but nothing could compare to Lily Evans and a mother, let alone Lily Evans as a mother. Dumbledore introduced them and Slughorn instantly knew that Dumbledore was trying to persuade him - and it seemed to be working. Slughorn tried to ignore Harry, looking resolutely anywhere else. Dumbledore talked to Slughorn for a few minutes to make it seem like he was genuinely here just for a chat.

When Delores Umbrige came into subject, I gritted my teeth. Since my passing I have found out a lot about Harry. One of the things is what Umbrige did to him, I would happily attack her if I was alive. Slughorn said that he didn't like her, which caused Harry to chuckle and agree. Dumbledore stood slightly and excused himself to the bathroom - this way Harry could talk to Slughorn.

Harry got the whole shpiel about how he looked just like James, except for his eyes - which were Lily's. Slughorn told Harry about how Lily was one of his favorites which earned the redhead cocky looks from James and I. I also came up into subject; how I had broken out of my family and gone into Gryfindor. He said that "it's a shame", he would have liked the set. Slughorn brought up the fact that Lily was muggle-born, and how he couldn't believe it when he found out. I knew that that was one of the best things Slughorn could say - Harry will bring up Hermione and get defensive, so that will show Slughorn that he is a good kid. I was correct, and Slughorn instantly defended himself.

This shot Slughorn into a new conversation - how all of his favorite students had gone on to become these great things. He talked about how they all kept in touch with him, which seemed to make him quite proud. Harry seemed to be actually interested in who Slughorn taught, and he listened as the professor rambled on about getting free tickets to the Harpies.

"And all these people know where to find you, to send you stuff?" Harry asked him interstedly.

We all grinned simultaneously at this.

"It's really too bad Harry doesn't realize how smart he is," James laughed. Harry was so blind sometimes, but his blindness was ingenious.

After Slughorn's realization, Dumbledore came out of the bathroom and told Harry that they were to leave. If they went to leave quick enough then Slughorn would jump to change his mind. Just as Harry and Dumbledore reached the front door, Slughorn yelled that he would take the job. I smiled, Harry had done it; albeit without knowing it. I couldn't help but wonder why Dumbledore wanted Slughorn to come back to Hogwarts, and as Harry and Dumbledore left, Dumbledore told the teen that Slughorn would try to collect him. I knew this already, but it made me think that that was what Dumbledore was trying to do; he wanted Harry to get close with Slughorn for some reason.

Dumbledore took Harry to the Burrow through appartition, and as he looked up at the uneven house I felt a wave of joy wash over me at the sight of Harry's large smile. Lily looked over at me and smiled as well.

"He really loves it there," she told me, although she seemed a bit saddened by this fact.

Dumbledore took Harry into the small shed outside of the Burrow for a private word. They talked about me at first, and my heart broke when Harry admitted that it's hard knowing that I won't ever write him again. But he regained himself like my godson in saying that he wasn't letting himself wallow away because I wouldn't want him to do that and life is too short, especially nowadays. Dumbledore also shared with him that he would be having private lessons with the headmaster!

"Wow," James said. "I wonder what they'll do in those." The two of us shared an excited look, obviously those lessons would be something about ending the war.

The Weasleys had the most xtensive protections provided, which made me, and I'm sure the two parents, feel more at ease. Harry promise to carry the cloak around at all times and to not risk anything while staying at the Burrow. I didn't think harry would, he thought too highly of Molly and Arthur, but it was nice to hear Harry promise none the less. They went up to the Burrow's door and got permission to come in from Molly after confirming who it was. Tonks was there and I frowned when I saw her.

Before I went to Azkaban, I had been close with her. I love Adromeda dearly and Tonks had been adorable as a child. Now, though, she was in love with my friend who was too stupid to admit that he loved her back. I rolled my eyes at the thought. Tonks didn't care that Remus was older or that he was a werewolf; while we had different types of love for the man, I loved him too and I understood how she did. I know that Remus loved her, and I knew that he and Tonks knew that he did as well; he ust wouldn't accept a relationship because he was stupid and thought he wasn't good enough. James, Lily and I all shared an annoyed look with each other about our friend as Tonks left the Burrow quickly. There were big things to happen.

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><p>Second spiritual chapter! :) This one is a bit longer than all of the other chapters I've written for this story, so I hope I could keep you guys entertained. Thank you to those who left a comment for the last chapter, so keep it up and let me know what you think! Thanks for reading.<p> 


	9. A Marauder's Son

So yeah, I did that thing again where I don't update for a long time. And I'm going to do that whole apology thing again, too: I am really sorry that I left this again. I fall in and out of inspirational times with writing. I literally have five or six stories have written out and half making it impossible for me to think of anything else! I was going to clean out my documents to find what I need to do and so on (I have to go through my stuff on this website and update too, :|) and I found an unfinished version of this chapter - so here it is, rewritten and completed, yay!

I hope you enjoy, and I have the ideas laid out for the rest of the chapters so hopefully I can settle long enough to get somewhere with it. Thanks for reading!

**Do I still have to do that disclaiming thing?**

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><p><strong>While He Is Sleeping<strong>

Chapter Nine – A Marauder's Son

"I agree that Harry deserves detention," James muttered once Lily had walked out of ear shot. "but during the final quidditch match? That's a bit far."

"Snape bloody sucks," I agreed. James and I had annoyed Lily so she had left telling us to let her know when Harry was done with detention. We were both watching the match and watching Harry filing our old detention papers. "I'm sure Snape's intention to get Harry mad about having to go through all of our files isn't working, though."

James grinned and tore his eyes away from the match long enough to read the paper that Harry was reading at the moment, we snorted.

"I anything, hopefully Harry will get some ideas from looking at them and re-enact."

"I doubt he will," I grumbled, shrugging and returning my eyes to the match. "But yes, I wish he would, too."

I've enjoyed watching Harry this year – to be able to know what he actually does while he's at school. I knew from what Harry had told me along with McGonagall and Remus that he did get in trouble, just not to the extent that James and I had. James and Lily have caught me up on all of the danger Harry has been in, and the more serious trouble he's been in and I must say that while I do have some pride for it, I am not too pleased that he's put himself in so many dangerous situations. (Que Lily smirking and James telling her "I told you so.")

And even though this year is dull in comparison, I'm happy for that same reason and it's still fun to watch.

This year, Dumbledore has been meeting up with Harry in order to teach him about Voldemort. I'm so relieved that Dumbledore is finally talking to Harry and is finally teaching Harry what must be done so that he can end the war – I've been telling him to do so since the incident in the graveyard. There's these things called horcruxes – I read about them in Grimmauld Place's library as a child – and they're horrible things, so I'm not too surprised that Voldemort has them. Only two of six have been destroyed thus far, though, which is where Harry comes in.

Besides the heavy burden of finishing off the worst war in wizardring history, Harry has also become infatuated with Ginny and extremely snarky with Snape – both make me very happy. Having spent ten years with Lily Evans, I was well aware of Harry's capability, but when talking to Snivellus he holds nothing back. For example, one of my highlights for this year was Harry's first day of term.

He and Ron had partnered up in DADA to practice non-verbal spells and, for the first time, weren't doing too bad. But, of course, Snape decided to be a git and hex Harry, who blocked it so well that Snape was knocked off balance.

James and mine cheers were nothing compared to our cheers when Harry had told Snape 'There's no need to call me sir, Professor' and even then, Lily joined in.

As Gryffindor won the quidditch house cup, James and I yelled for joy. The racket we were making caused Lily to come back to see what was going on, and she grinned when she saw the score.

"Harry will be so happy that they won," she said, beaming.

"Hopefully Ginny can tell him about the match without Ron there," I added, grinning as I watched the team celebrate all the way up to the castle.

"_Sirius."_

"What? Don't you want your son to know love?"

Lily gave me an annoyed look. "Of course I do, you dolt. But 'getting' Ginny isn't the only thing he should be thinking about."

James rolled his eyes behind his wife. "I'm sure Harry can multitask." Lily smacked him hard across his back, and smiled at me as I sniggered.

By the time the Gryffindor house had all gathered back in the common room, Snape let Harry leave. The three of us all sat down on a sofa and waited for Harry to find out, James and I filled Lily in on the high lights of the match.

"Ginny's brilliant," James sighed wishfully. Lily giggled.

"She really is," I agreed. "Lucky for us we'll be able to watch her become a professional player and show everyone else her brilliance."

Harry asked the Fat Lady the outcome of the match, but she didn't answer so instead he walked inside and was instantly grinning from the sound of celebration. The entire house turned when he entered and cheered even more gleefully at the sight of their captain. Ginny ran towards him to hug him, but instead, Harry kissed her.

All three of us gasped, but then James and I yelled out joyfully, sprung upright and shared a victory dance.

"HA! Look at Ron's face!" laughed Lily as she, too, stood up.

James and I stopped dancing long enough to look at the scene – Dean looked furious ("Serves him right!") Romilda Vane looked murderous ("At least she's taken the hint.") and Ron looked as if someone had clubbed him upside the head.

"Well, at least he isn't strangling Harry!" James exclaimed happily. He jumped up and down with his hands on Lily's shoulders. "I hope they get married! Do you know how great their kids would be at quidditch!?"

"Is that seriously all you're thinking about?" Lily asked him, staring at him as if he was crazy.

James looked offended. "No – Fred and George must also teach them the basics of pranking so they can all cause havoc!"

"_James."_

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><p>Quick question: Do you want to see Sirius looking down Harry's kids too? At what moments in their lives?<p> 


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